Dartboard

I overslept today. I came into the office after the morning meeting and apologized to kyoto-sensei. He asked why. I said because I was late this morning. He says, “Is that so?” And Hatakeyama-sensei leans over to explain I was late and missed the meeting, but honestly he didn’t even notice I was gone. That makes it hard for me understand why it’s so important that I be there.

It’s no doubt Kyoto-sensei doesn’t know what’s going on. I’ve never seen someone sleep so much on the job. It’s not full-on snoring, drooling sleep, but occasionally it’s fast-asleep and unaware of what's going on around him. I wonder, as he sits at his desk, rocking back in his easy chair, head nodding and eyelids drooping, if he actually HAS a job. Sometimes I see him chicken-scratching away at his computer, but I never get a sense of urgency from this man. But really—not noticing that I wasn’t in attendance at the meeting when I’m just three desks away? It doesn’t make me feel very loved.

Speaking of love. And BEING loved, not NOT being loved. I love Nonaka-sensei. She’s a P.E. teacher at my school and although she doesn’t speak great English, she always makes me feel welcomed and important. I’ve always felt she was special but I really noticed it this morning when I was working on a computer next to her and I was having printing problems. I didn’t say anything, but 5 seconds later she leaned over with a “どうしたの？” and offered to help me.

Usually when I have a problem I must look at everyone in the office, try to gauge their current busyness and then weigh how comfortable they are talking with me, then courageously inquire—“if you’re not too busy!!”—for help with the computer or copier. Nonaka-sensei immediately knows if sometimes wrong by the error beep on the computer or the look on my face; she always asks if I feel better when I return from being sick or the hospital and wants to take my temperature (but isn’t pushy and standing over me while I’m doing it—she’s much too busy and gives me more space than that.)

She asks, “How was your summer? What did you do? Do you miss your family? Aren’t you homesick? Are you feeling better? Did you catch a cold?” And although there are others out there who ask me questions and show their concern for me, I especially appreciate it from her because she’s obviously too busy to be concerned, but is anyway. Not a tea lady who just wipes counters and empties trash and has that kind of time to spare, but a full-fledged, 18-classes-a-week teacher, a club activity coach, and department head.

I love the way she supports me: She actually comes to ME to ask if her track and field students have done MY English homework otherwise she’s suspending them from practice and the so-and-so competition next weekend!!! Unbelievable! That shows so much respect for me and I can’t tell you enough how much I appreciate it! I don’t really feel like a “sensei” as I don’t have nearly the responsibility or class load as a “real teacher” but I do feel like my job is important—otherwise, what the H-E-double-hockey-stick am I doing here?—and I like it when other teachers think what I do is important. It makes me feel validated and like I could pull a little more weight if I have faith in my role.

(I swear this is the last paragraph!) She’s not just kind to me either, she’s sincerely concerned and thoughtful and caring to everyone. It’s amazing she’s got that kind of energy! She’s been at Nakako for six years (which is the minimum required at island schools) so I was worried she might be leaving in April, but she loves this school and wants to volunteer herself for another year (which is smiled upon at these wretched island schools). I, too, am very happy she’ll be here until I leave next August—‘cause what would I do with her? I mean, I bet SHE noticed that I wasn’t at the meeting this morning…

Loved (by at least one person in this staffroom),
Sierra