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Of course, I couldn’t sleep at all last night. I stayed up until 3:30 a.m.

Damn that long nap.

My alarm didn’t go off this morning either. It didn’t go off yesterday, so I figured I set it wrong somehow. But two mornings in a row. I’ll have to check it out.

I usually start my car at 7:50 a.m. and I try to leave the apartment by 7:55. It takes about 8 minutes to get to work and the meeting starts promptly at 8:15 p.m. I’ve worked it out perfectly, so I arrive with just enough time to look composed, but no earlier then I really have to. This morning I woke up and looked at the clock.

It was 7:58 a.m.

Bam. Somehow there’s a rocket under my butt and I’m flying through the apartment. Getting dressed, gathering my lunch, bag and keys, gargle some mouthwash and I’m out the door in about 3 minutes.

Now. The Car.

Kuro kuma-kun doesn’t like to wake up quickly. He still thinks it’s winter and you know how bears like to hibernate in the winter. So I give him about 2 minutes to idle and I try to go. I’m not “late” at this point, but I’m later than I like to be.

And he gives me crap the whole drive! Grumbling as we drive up the hill near my house. It’s really frustrating and all I can do is put on my flashers, hang to the left as much as possible and let cars pass me as I try to get up the hill in second gear. It’s pouring rain and very windy and all I can think about is how stupid I'll look walking in late.

As I pull into the school parking lot, Bear is finally warmed up and ready to go.

Five minutes ago would have been helpful.

I’ve got about 2 minutes to spare as I walk into the staff room. I notice many teachers are leaving the staff room—walking down the hall to another room. This isn’t right. Everyone should be walking toward the staff room with this little time until the meeting.

I see my supervisor. He scrunches up his nose, “You look so awful.”

He’s charming, really.

“Maybe,” he begins.

Because that’s how they do it in Japan. They always start with a maybe, like it’s going to be a suggestion when they really just want to tell you what to do.

“Maybe you can go home.”

I think of the two minute race to get myself out of my apartment. The slow and painful drive to get myself to this meeting on time.

“Today we will have a special meeting only for teachers. Maybe you can go home.”

Relief settles over me.

“We will lock the doors... Now.”

Translation: Get out of the staffroom and go home so we can have our meeting.

You don’t have to tell me twice.

Back at home, I go back to bed. And I don’t get out. Until it's long past noon.

They are finally beginning to understand me.

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The doors in my apartment have come down. I’m officially accepting the coming of spring.

That could be a song title… Bringing Down The Doors.

I write the title, you write the song.

This morning was the junior high graduation ceremony. I went “kakoi” in my white suit, purple shirt and pink belt. I got lots of compliments. It started out with Japan’s national anthem. National anthems always give me shivers. I’m glad. I like that I'm the kind of person who gets shivers from national anthems. I think that says something about who I am.

But I’m high on psuedoephedrine right now. Later I might deny I ever said that.

Today’s exchange rate is 104.5392546391 yen to the dollar.
So make sure they don’t cheat you and only give you 104.5392546191 yen for that dollar.

I’ve been home since 1:30 today. I was getting hot flashes and coughing up my lungs at school and they told me to go home. I had my radio show at 12:30, then they said to leave as soon afterwards as I could. I didn’t have any classes anyway, so I came home and slept.

Getting ready to take my next dose of acetaminophen, chlorpheniramine maleate, dextromethorphan hydrobromide, and pseudoephedrine hydrochloride.

It sounds like I'm hearing everything from distant speakers. Like it’s all been pre-recorded and I’m just getting the echo. You know how that happens when you’re sick and your ears get all plugged up and no matter how much you swallow they never quite unplug.

That’s it.

I hope I can sleep tonight. That’ll be even worse if I can’t sleep through the night then have to get up for work and be awake all day again. Will just have to steal a nap in one of the beds in the nurse’s room. Did I ever mention that? One day I slept for 3 hours in the nurse’s room. The beds there are so comfortable. Last Friday I took another two hour nap in the teacher’s tatami room too. Woke up just a couple minutes before 4 p.m. Somehow I always manage to wake up just before it’s time to go home… Good timing, I say. Good timing.

I’m looking around my apartment. All sick and no movies to watch. I’ve watched out my apartment, I think. What did I do before movies? I did something. Probably the dishes…and my laundry. Both are overflowing now.

On Rice

Rice.
Warm and moist.
Hot out of the cooker.
With sesame seeds.
I love rice.

Maybe I’ll read. Or study. I’ve completely neglected studying for the past few days.

I just found this picture in some old files on my computer. It’s me during a soccer game at Linfield. My coach is knealing next to me and that's the trainer behind him.

I loved soccer my senior year of college. I played so well. To my potential, I think. I got all the glory as forward and goal-scorer too. That probably helped. But no, really. I think by the time I was a senior I just stopped caring. I spent too many years on a team, where I was a nervous wreck. Too nervous to play well and lacked all confidence. As soon as I stopped caring, I didn't have to be nervous anymore. When I wasn't nervous, I played like I played in practice. Like a god. Not really, but it felt good to be good. To have all those underclassmen looking up to you. For the coach to pay attention to you. I loved Brian, the coach. I thought he cared about me, and he always wanted me back in the game when I came out. This picture reminds me of those times.

And this is my friend Steven (the Steven who asked the “kiss me in a park” question). He’s a George Fox student now, but was in the Air Force for four years before that. We’ve known each other since 5th grade—when we worked on this Endangered Species project together and he drew pictures of turtles and Asian elephants. We didn’t become friends until our senior year of high school when my best friend lived at his house. He calls himself a “lucky side-effect” to our relationship. I agree! My best friend didn't last, but he did.

Steven in Kuwait. This must be his special pose.

Steven’s been a great friend recently. I seem to go in and out of these internet-relationships with friends and family back home. I’ll talk to some people online religiously for weeks and then we don't talk for months. Steven’s been my Flavor of the Month, I suppose.

Going to start laundry and make dinner. Let's hope I can sleep tonight!
Love, Sierra

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What a weekend!

First of all, I got to video-chat with an ex-boyfriend, Jared, forever on Saturday morning! We see each other online often, but I’m always at school so we can’t audio or video-chat, but he finally caught me on a weekend! It was nice to catch up—he’s just as wonderful and happy as ever. Again, the hair—it was not like this when we met! He recently broke up with his girlfriend which explains the unshaven, greasy look. Okay, not really…he was always unshaven and loved the grudge look.

Saturday I spent 3 hours at the pool. Yes. Count them. THREE! I was doing my workout—my goal was 1.25 km without rest and I was on lap 24 when I noticed people in the other lanes were looking at me funny. At lap 25 I was flagged down—the lane I was swimming in had been changed to a lesson lane. The only lane available had 12 thousand walkers so I had to stop. Five lanes. Four for lessons. One for walkers. What about swimmers! Just 5 more laps until I reached my goal! But I had to stop, so I chatted with the old ladies, onsened, walked in the walking pool, KILLED TIME for an hour until I could finally go finish. I ended up doing another set of 25 laps so I swam a total of 2.5 km instead, which is much further anyway, but I would have liked to finish my goal.

I talked to Tanabe and Ryohei for a long time too. They are both so sweet and funny. My heart goes out to Ryohei... Tanabe finally said on Saturday that my stroke is "jozu” (good). He's never said that before where I’ve actually believed him—I could always use more instruction. But his last suggestion to me on Friday was “Relax!” and then I got it! Sometimes you just GET IT and I felt like I was really swimming well Saturday. It felt good to be told so by someone that actually knows too. Then he invited me to join his lesson from now on. He teaches three 5th grade girls every evening, but they are some of the better swimmers so they need very little instruction. He usually just talks to me during their whole lesson anyway. I really like the girls, Yui especially. It’ll be nice to join them occasionally.

Tanabe invited me to his baseball game on Sunday morning in Arikawa. He said it might be canceled because of the snow, and it was, but I still went up early to watch some of my students play a soft-tennis match nearby. It was too cold to stay for long so I went to the pool again where I met Shigehisa in the parking lot. We went swimming until noon then decided to go eat ramen at my number one favorite ramen restaurant. It was fun, but awkward at times when you don’t know exactly what to say and it doesn’t come easily in a foreign language.

After ramen we went out to the car and I had a dead battery! I had left the head-lights on and so I got a jump-start from one of the cooks in the restaurant. Probably most embarrassing was that not one of us could find the latch to pop the hood! There were three of us searching everywhere for it, going, “へえ、へええ！” and finally someone in the restaurant came out to open the glove box and pull the latch. Damn. How embarrassing. I don't know who our savior was, but we would probably still be looking for it if he hadn’t come. We jump-started and I took Shigehisa home. He also showed me the only gas station that’s open on Sundays. Now can someone please show me the ATM that doesn’t charge a $2.00 fee on the weekends?

In the afternoon Yuka and I met to make books. She’s a book-maker. She taught me how to make a book with the traditional Japanese binding. It was really interesting to learn, and now I’ve got to work up the courage to actually use it for something. It’s my first book. What is special enough to be in my first book!?! I don’t want to ruin it! I was feeling pretty miserable (my sore throat got a little sorer than I hoped) so we went out for dinner and then I went home to go to bed early.

Here you can see the binding.

Do I look sick? Well, it’s my only excuse.

Today is White Day. (Remember the “reverse” Valentine’s Day in Japan when the guys give the girls presents.) I got a present. From Koichiro, of course. It’s just a bag of cookies and chocolates with a note. A sweet gesture. He’s probably leaving the island in 2 weeks. Friday is umidohi. Judgment Day. The ax will fall. The teachers that are leaving will be advised that they have two weeks to get outta town. Tomonaga-sensei is nervous. He doesn’t want to leave, but he’s afraid he’ll have to! I’ll be sad to see him go.. unless he’s replaced by a nice, young, and single English teacher. That wouldn’t be so bad.

That’s all from me today. The sun is shining again—the weekend must be over!
Love, Sierra

P.S. And the title of this blog. My friend, Steven, needs to do a psychology project in which he breaks social norms. Recording people’s reactions to a 25-year-old guy making-out with a 70-year-old woman is breaking a social norm, right? If only I were still in Oregon and contribute to this good cause! Steven, I love you!

The “Ash Event” at Mt. St. Helens? My mom sent me this picture of Helen’s (a mountain in Washington that erupted in 1981) blowing ash. I didn’t know about it—was this scheduled? This is also just a good view of the landscape near my home in Oregon.

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