Dartboard

Bedtime.

I love putting the kids in bed and having my one-on-one time with them. We do High-Lows so I get to talk to each of them individually for a while. We give hugs and say good-night. Then I go on to the next one.

And the house is quiet and the lights are off. Finally, it's my time.

I don't have to worry about staying up very late anymore. I love being a night owl, but I can't afford to miss the sleep! My days are really full here, but they are full of good memories.

I'm not sure if this is alleviating or merely suppressing my desire to have children immediately!! It's certainly helping me realize how once I have them, my life will revolve around them ...unless I hire a nanny to do it for me--and this experience is helping me realize I don't want that for my own family. I wouldn't miss out on all this great stuff for the world!!!

I just had the worst 24 hours of my life.

I think I got food poisoning at the zoo on Thursday. I have gotten food poisoning before, but this was really awful.

The whole night I was shivering and in cold sweats. First the diarrhea every hour. Then the nausea. I threw up five times in succession--twice on the floor and three times in the sink. My whole body was empty, and I needed water so badly, but I was too tired to move any distance further than that of my bed to the toilet. Then I had to clean up after myself because it was 3 in the morning and everyone was sleeping.

I did wake up Tom and ask him for a plunger for the clogged sink, but he said not to worry about it, he would clean it up before the kids woke up in the morning. But he didn't, so it was still there when I got out of bed around nine and I eventually cleaned it up myself.

Then I found out my grandfather died Thursday night.

He was very sick, but it's always sad news. My aunt sent me a picture of him a few hours before he died and he was so thin. He and my father looked a lot alike; it was difficult to see him.

I slept most of the day, but definitely not peacefully. My body ached and tummy rumbled. I can't even describe how my head felt--it was plain and simple misery. I just cried.

I called and reported the Polar Bear Cafe to the Health Department in Rhode Island. We had driven down to Providence for the day and I think it was at the zoo where I ate something bad.

All day Friday I drank water because I had this thirst that couldn't be quenched. I ate some fiber cereal in the morning and I was hungry for dinner at night, but a few bites into my mashed potatoes and I got diarrhea again. I just decided to quit.

Late last night I actually had to pee for the first time since Wednesday which I took as a good sign!

I slept prety well last night. I was too hot instead of too cold but I also realized my radiator is right next to my bed and the heat gets trapped under my comforter making it worse. I'm going to change beds to try and avoid that problem in the future. I don't know if this house is just too big but it's always either too hot or too cold, never just right. The bedrooms are little furnaces but the larger rooms are freezing. Tom doesn't like it when we wear coats in the house so he warms it up, but then the rooms boil.

The water is the same way. The shower is always scalding hot or lukewarm. And someone starts the laundry and your shower is over, buddy!! Pretty frustrating because we're always doing laundry here!!

Anyway, today I feel better. Took the kids to paint pottery and I made something too. I've got two more days with them before they're back to school. I love spending time with them. I am trying to get them to eat less sugar and have tried to cut fried foods out of their diet. When they're with their parents they can do whatever, but when they're withl me they will NOT have hot chocolate and bacon for breakfast or watch TV all day long!!

Luckily they obey me without too much complaint.

I already know I'm an organic, tree-hugging Oregonian, but I just thought of another reason why I LOVE Portland: free internet at the airport! Why are all those other airports so cheap and charge like $7 for internet! Geesus louisus!

So I'm in the airport and heading back to Boston. I gave myself the recommended 2 hours to check-in and go through security and it took like 10 minutes. I have almost 2 hours to wait now... The guy in the chair across from me is eating his nails, then gave me the "wassup" nod when I looked at him. The fingers in the mouth part is so unattractive and has encouraged me to watch my own habits!

Christmas was great. I was really eager to "make memories" this year and I think that was accomplished. It's pretty easy to get busy during the holidays and never actually do anything above and beyond the typical materialistic pursuits of shopping and over-indulging. I'm glad we went out to the coast and I visited with old friends back in Oregon for the holidays.

We also started getting the house cleaned up a little more and I'm happily down to just two homes again. I've always hated having my things spread out in different cities and countries, or even apartments. This fall/winter was exhausting having little parts of my life all over Portland, Tokyo, Detroit and then! the prospect of getting it to Boston. Finally I feel like my special things are carefully packed in Oregon and all my heaviest coats are in transit to Boston. Despite Boston being in the 50s last week I am coming prepared with winter hats, gloves and scarves! I've invested so much in coats this year!

This year has been very different. Since being back in the states some people have asked me about my time in Japan or whether I've experienced re-entry culture shock, etc. I've traveled abroad enough to know that most people are looking for the superficial answers like, "It was just great!" and I only expect a couple people to actually take the time to sit down, ask the interesting questions and then listen to my answers. Inevitably those people are usually the people who have spent 6 months or more in a foreign country and know that it was more than "just great."

In fact, mostly I haven't felt a lot of re-entry culture shock--at least not in a way that really surprises or disgusts me. Of course I've noticed differences: American's cell phone habits in public areas are horrendous and everyone is so darn informal (what happened to the art of walking your guests to the door?!), but it's not like I'm scratching on the walls of Japan's immigration office and begging to be let back in. I've handled most situations pretty well, I believe.

However, things are different this year. I do feel like the person who left for Japan in 2004 is not the same person who came back in 2006. I see the world with different eyes and I think the conversations I have are not with the same perspective. My interests have changed. My priorities have changed. My mentality has changed. I can't always be sure how they are different, but I do notice a difference. I prefer to write in specifics and using examples but I'm also not sure how to go about describing it. Mostly I just take every opportunity to talk, talk, talk!!! I'm sure my family has felt roped into conversations about politics, religion and culture way more than usual this year!

I've also made a few relatively big decisions in the last couple of months--they are pretty personal so I won't go into them here, but a lucky few of you will get to hear all about them whenever I can steal your time!

More posts and pictures when I get back to Boston! Safe holidays now, ya hear?!

The whole family together for the first time since 2004.

Thank you Yuki ;)

I am having a great time at home. It's such a short visit, but I love being here. I'm having an awesome time with my brother. He is so grown up and mature now, but our friendship is just as close as ever. I feel confident in him. He's polite and loving and intelligent. I worried about him so much, but he's turning out to be a great man.

Yesterday we went shopping at the coast. There are outlets and I took James shopping at GAP for Christmas. I bought him new jeans and a sweater and he looks so good! He prefers womens jeans, and we actually ended up buying the same pair---same size and color, except mine were 8 long instead of regulars. Today we wore our matching jeans. It's so cool.

For dinner tonight we all got in the kitchen to prepare this intense meal. George, my mom, James and I were all busy for over an hour---and we put out this amazing feast. Of course, I was superviser as usual, and took my role of delegating jobs quite seriously! =) Someone HAS to be in charge!! When we all sat down it felt so good to have worked together to do it. And clean up with four people is such a breeze! The whole experience makes me want to shout out how much I love my family!!!

My brother can sing! I had no idea he had an interest in singing, nevermind talent! But as we were drying dishes tonight we started singing together. It was all inspired by a sung prayer before a meal at the Ball's house (a friend from high school)! I want so badly to sing well---but I'm just hopeless! So being around people who can sing makes me jump for joy! James started singing a song from Moulin Rouge and telling us about his appearance in the Job Corb talent show! I was so impressed!

So, as much as I wondered what would happen with James, I finally feel like it'll all work out positively. He always had potential, but now I'm sure that he'll realize it! I just wish we lived closer...