Dartboard

I am positively glowing.

I’m sitting on my futon on the floor in the dark with an open window in front of me. I feel a warm evening wind blowing on my sunburned face. I can smell the “cut-grass” scent of new tatami below me. I hear the sounds of neighbors chatting casually on the eve of a national holiday while frogs and crickets ribbet and buzz. It’s already dark out, so all I can see are the white curtains in the window blowing lazily in the wind.

I feel like a child who is finally succumbing to slumber after a long day in the sun, but not wanting the day to end continues to listen to her parents and the other adults socializing outside by the pool. These childhood memories have such soft edges. It’s as close as I ever come to living in the moment. My eyelids droop and I day dream about the calm atmosphere outside. A crackling fire in the barbeque pit and the smooth surface of the water in the pool.

What a beautiful day.

I didn’t have a barbeque by a pool with my parents today obviously, but the sunburn certainly reminds me of those days in California. Instead I went on a hike with my students. We walked to a park in Wakamatsu—about 2.5 hours along the highway and played dodgeball and ate lunch under the glorious sun. It was such a fun day, and I’ve had the best interactions with students. The best conversations. They weren’t just good, or near to the top. They were THE BEST interactions I’ve had with any students in my 8 months here.

Absolutely subarashii.

During the walk I talked to the first year students. They are so outgoing, open and honest. I feel like I’m getting to see them in their last few weeks before the reality of high school life hits them and they become shy little clams refusing to try anything where they could make a mistake. They are wonderful. Both the boys and girls. The girls are so sweet! They jump and scream “Hello Shiera!!” when I walk by. Then they don’t let me JUST walk by, they want to hold my hand, sing me songs, take pictures with me, and SPEAK IN ENGLISH!!! They tell me about their boyfriends and crushes, who the popular boys are this year, and who’s atami ga ii (smart, lit. “head is good”).

The boys, besides trying to convince me that “No! [pointing finger] HE loves you more!”, also ACTUALLY SPEAK ENGLISH! I ask them easy questions like “How tall are you? What junior high school did you go to? What time did you go to bed last night?” etc, but they actually try to listen and together, as a team, work out what I’m saying and respond. It’s not even class and they want to participate, to get to know me better.

I can’t believe my luck.
My kids are the best.

I was asked to play dodgeball during the championship game. I wasn’t just asked, the first years pulled me into the game and told me to play. I wasn’t even participating (you know how guys tend to dominate this sport) and when they noticed they said, “Eehhh! Shiera throw the ball!” and everyone stopped while I threw the ball. Even the “rowdy punks” think I’m cool. This class is doing wonders for my self-esteem.

My kyoto-sensei giving the students some kind of “pep talk” before the ensoku begins.

Here is the trail of students leaving the school in the morning.

I didn’t really realize this, but the purpose of the hiking day was to welcome the freshman to the school. So, here the freshman get their special entrance with applause and music.

Lunch was even better. I wasn’t sure where to sit or who to sit with, so I wandered around aimlessly for a while. Finally I sat down right next to three third year (seniors) boys: Junya, Kazuya and Eiji. For 2.5 hours we ate lunch next to the ocean and I had the most heart-to-heart conversation I’ve had with any Japanese student. I appreciated their honesty, their bravery and their maturity. What great kids.

Apparently until today, my martial status was in question. I can’t believe they all thought I was married! To whom, I’m not sure, but I assume Daniel. It came out when I asked if they had girlfriends and they all said no. They said, “We want girlfriends though,” and I said, “Me too.”

“Eehh? Shiera’s marriage, desho?”

“No, I’m not married! Why do you think I’m married?”

My rings. Who cares what finger they’re on… Rings in Japan mean marriage. My diamonds, which aren’t even big, are bigger than anyone’s wedding ring. Most women just wear a band to signify marriage—that is, if they wear anything at all.

Then Kazuya proposed. My first proposal in Japan. I said, “Okay,” and he was so excited he asked when we could do it. I think that’s when they really opened up to me. When they realized I can joke around too, that I’m not much older than they are, and… I’m not taken!!

We talked about the guys in school that like me and which guys I like. Kazuya was really pushing the marriage thing. He said he wants an international marriage and to live in Spain because he loves soccer. I taught them how to say “I love you” in Spanish. Kazuya has always really impressed me. He wrote in our class notebook to me, when I asked him about his future, “I want to be a fireman, marry a pretty girl and be happy.” Perhaps it’s the crudeness of the language, but his simplicity in stating those three things just really made an impression on me.

Could I have said that so simply at seventeen?

I told Kazuya to wait until graduation next April, then he could call me. He agreed. So I told him he also had to speak English with me, if we were ever going to have a marriage that worked. He agreed to study very hard. In a last attempt to defer him I said, “But I don’t think I would ever marry a Japanese.” What?!? They were shocked. I explained how Japanese men are so focused on their jobs and family always comes second. I couldn’t have a husband who thought of me and his children as second to anything. I made this motion with my hands like I had blinders on and said, “Shigoto, shigoto, shigoto” (Work, work, work.) Then all three boys put blinders on their heads and said, “Sierra, Sierra, Sierra.” It was absolutely adorable.

We continued talking about all kinds of things. I asked them why they were so shy in my classes. Eiji and Kazuya are very smart kids, but as my mom can attest, even in a class of just five students, they can’t bear to answer a question for fear of getting it wrong. Eiji said even if his peers don’t laugh on the outside, their hearts are laughing at your mistake, so he has to wear a mask in school. I argued that you have to make mistakes to learn. If I didn’t ever speak Japanese for fear of making a mistake I would not have made nearly as much progress as I have.

They didn’t understand immediately so I repeated each sentence slowly and they worked together to translate what I was saying. So much effort just to understand me—I’m sure they would have preferred to be shooting the breeze in Japanese, but they stuck with me. This was the best “class” I’ve taught yet and I was amazed at these boys attention span—focusing on my every word. Eiji even pulled out paper and scribbled new vocabulary words down as I talked. I was very impressed with their diligence and sincerity. Junya has always been great in class.

I noticed Kazuya was being quiet so I asked what was up. He said he was still shocked. I asked why. “Sierra’s not married.”

Next April if I have an 18 year-old Japanese graduate on my doorstep asking me to run away to Spain I have no one to blame but myself.

Tomorrow I leave for my hitch-hike. That means I won’t be posting for about 10 days. Plenty of time to read and re-read this post (or catch up on old ones, hint, hint.) There will be tests! =)

Ha, I wonder if I actually had tests on my blog who would do the best. That’s amusing to think about…

It’s midnight and I haven’t even packed yet. That’s more devastating when you realize my ferry leaves at 6:20 a.m. tomorrow. From Arikawa. Arikawa is a 45 minute drive from here. I basically will be starting this vacation off with no sleep, but Peter sleeps a lot so I’ll get caught up with him.

Sleeping bag. Check. Tent. Check. Japanese dictionary. Check. Flashlight. Check. Map. Ch…no map yet. Let’s hope the drivers know where they are going…

T’will be an adventure,
Love, Sierra

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